#8: Fauxjobs

This topic has been much debated in my general circle of friends. We have theorized for hours upon hours on what an acceptable and realistic job for a hipster is (yes, jobs, NEVER careers). So, this post is an important analysis for the project, since it is of utmost importance to find the hipsters in their day-to-day setting, observe them doing “what they do,” and await the perfect time to infiltrate.

Okay, so for starters, the one life choice upon which there is no real debate among my cohorts as the most acceptable hipster-job of all: no job at all. (Sidenote: Just created a new term, “Fauxjob”, silent “J,” not to be confused with its homophone, that racist slang I was unaware of until my Antitrust class while discussing products that are Free On Board.) This option pretty limited though, mainly only original trust fund-hipsters can really pull this off. Don’t misunderstand, they are not “unemployed,” they have merely chosen not to conform with the societal norm of working with the masses. They are different, they need time to create (not actual things, just ideas that they don’t necessarily write down or share with others), time to think (thoughts you would never understand), and also time to solve the sustainable food dilemma. These are the hipsters that once defined the movement. However, these are also the hipsters that have, ironically, become the antitheist of it. Many mod-hipsters look down on those who look down on others (again, you may sigh at the irony), and see TF-hipsters as sitting around, wasting their (not)god-given talent, living off mainstream money (as that is how their upper-class suburban parents earned it).

Ok, well, after that rather harsh look at those who I am clearly only envious of, I will come to the more productive hipster. These are your DJs - not at trendy clubs, mind you, but more at raves, music festivals, etc. (Although some do spin at a trendy restaurant/lounge/hotel once in a while, as I encountered a particularly adorable one at Palihouse recently.) They are also your graphic designers, your (street) artists, your indi-writers, band members (mostly keyboardists), and other creative types. They could, but not often, work for a tech company, or some other new, upstart that will soon be cool, but it's alright, they were there when the seed was planted. They will be chefs and restaurant owners for sure (all kinds of food), or servers at your local vegan/raw food restaurant. They are bartenders, or bar owners. They also work in television, but not film for some reason. These are the jobs I’ve recognized, not every debater feels the same. If there are more, or if you disagree with my list (and can provide valid arguments supporting this contention), please feel free to let me know.

Until next time, I am going to hang out at my local videogame developer’s headquarters, looking for my in/boyfriend (as I am partial to the slightly geeky hipster employed there).